April’s tears…

I have spent the whole end of April crying, praying and begging to the Lord Almighty for Him to give me the one thing that would allow me to pursue my “Aussie dream.”  I have been very anxious about how my life is going to be, where I will be residing, how much should my pocket money be, about my duel with the immigration and stuffs. I have overlooked the one thing that’s important for me to be able to worry all the worries that I have contemplated. Can’t figure it out? I haven’t too, ‘til it had knocked me off bitterly out of my wits. I did not have my Aussie Visa on time and without it, how can all my qualms and aspirations materialize? A wake up call that made me hang loose, loose cause it made me desperate and hopeless, so hopeless that I would rather have physical torture than mental torture.

As April was coming to an end, I was starting to question my faith, as to whether HE could hear my prayers, for the ONE vital thing that I was asking. I was trying to decipher if I could be heard well if I will pray while sitting, lying, standing, head-stand, tumbling or by the old-fashioned way… kneeling? I’ve tried it all, except for the 5^th option, I didn’t have that much talent to be able to execute a prayer on that very specific customized manner. Also, I have appealed to all of the saints, angels and souls in purgatory. I was counting days, till I was about to give up. I am running out of time. My class is on the 4^th of May and it was the 29^th of April.

Voila! My long awaited and most cried for precious VISA arrived. I couldn’t believe that it is here, at last. But it’s too late, it’s the 14^th of May and I’m 10days late for school. I was moved on the next intake. Bitter, unexpected, unfair, but I have to accept it. On the brighter side, at least I now have my passes, for me to be able to legally arrive to my desired destination. This tragedy has left me unwaged for 4months, I have nothing but much time for leisure and relaxation, but I am fund less to be splurging on that idea. To make things work, I chose to study ahead of time and turn things around. At least, this time, things will be on my side, or at least they are, I presume.

Lastly, I’ve learned that I have to coordinate everything with HIM. This incident has made me a person with a stronger faith. I have learned that there are certain purposes for things that are taking place in our lives and that we just have to believe in HIM. Now, my tears have been wiped out. More importantly, I have now the courage to say that I will be able to live my dreams, according to HIS will. My April tears are being mended, tears that now have ended.

…

I have planned plans that I have directed myself to go to. Plans that are according to what I see as essential and should be done. I was solely focused on what I have decided to do. I have made myself an itinerary, a MUST. But all of a sudden these things did not materialize. All of a sudden things went the other way, I was caught off guard. I did not expect this. I overlooked things. I did not have a plan B, C or any back-up plan for that matter. I am questioning things that have occurred. Where did I go wrong? Where can I troubleshoot? Why is this happening? This is not what I have planned? What’s the purpose of this? Have I planned on my own or I should’ve had coordinated with someone with the highest power? Isn’t what I have planned beneficial for my development? Or does He have anything for me? What is this? Is this true? Nah! I’m just having a nightmare? But why am I awake? When will this end? When will I be able to say THANK YOU, at last I’m living my dreams? What can I do? I have given up things for these plans. What’s left of me now is a mere individual who have courageously dropped her old life just to live her dreams. I have gambled but I haven’t even commenced on the chance that I have staked at and I am now struggling. Is this the worth of being a gambler?

REMINISCING

Yesterday was another quality time spent with my friends. We’ve had one of the best times of our lives. We went playing badminton, window shopping at a certain mall, dinner and of course, we had our all time “heart-to-heart talk” at a certain coffee shop that we so, so love.

We’ve talked about things that are happening, have happened and will happen in our lives: present, future and some funny and unforgotten pasts. How we so, so love that certain event that had happened during high school? How we caused so much headaches to our high school teachers… all of it, including those crushes that we’ve had.

Looking back, many things have changed, from the way they look up to the way things are. How things could have been if we decided the other way, but we didn’t so we leave it as it is. Hehe. (SIGH!) Yeah, I don’t have to elaborate on it, my friends know it. And you just have to let things be. Live and let live. Be happy. XOXO

cancelled trip

I just got a call from one of those airline companies that we’ve booked in, that pesonnel informed me about the cancellation of that certain flight that we’ve booked at. SIGH! I hate it! I’ve had high hopes on that trip. I even bought new stuffs for the pictorials, but what can I do, they just can’t serve their customers right. It’s a bad thing we’ve chose to book at that airline

. We should’ve chose the other airline. But maybe this is a blessing in disguise, maybe something bad might happen or whatever, that is why that trip of ours was cancelled. On the brighter side, I might as well save my stuff for an event that would put it to good use. hehe. Moral of the story, don’t book on a certain airline company that hasn’t proven themselves, YET. 

dilemma

Some days ago, I have received an offer that I have endured waiting. It’s a regular position from the institution that I am working at, I’ve been working at this place for more than 3years now and lo and behold this offer came. But then I have to rethink, because I am planning to work abroad and the offer came very late. At first, I was tempted to accept the offer and gamble whatever it is that I have to gamble for me to be able to hit two achievements in one stone. But as I went to sleep, I tossed and turned in bed, thinking and rethinking about this dilemma that I am given. If I will choose to pursue with this opportunity that I will have to give up soon, I will have problems with my clearance and may be I will leave a not so pleasing legacy when I resign. So I decided to drop the offer, even if it pains me, considering the fact that I have endured so much with the long wait and the grueling process (sigh). I just have to accept it; I can not have everything in life. I have to give up some things in order to make other people’s dream come true.

If you don’t want me… say it! Or if you like me… say it! JUST SAY IT!

I hope that’s how aggressive we are in terms of dealing with people in our lives. Most often, we suck in the unwanted emotions that are coming our way just for us to please people or to create a good reputation, but deep inside us scream “I HATE THAT PERSON.” That’s how plastic or untrue we are! For most Filipinos, that is.

As humble as we Filipinos are, we don’t want anyone to get hurt, so instead of saying “I don’t want the way you treat me…” we say “oh I see, I agree or yes you’re right.” How unreal and pitiful we get. We succumb into lying and we sulk in to the unpleasant tactful aura that we create.

Why not say, “I don’t like the way you handle things with me!” or “I don’t like how you are treating me!” Take a gamble! Stand up for your selves. Don’t be afraid that people will get mad just because you’ve been true to what you feel. Take that as a credit for your selves. Give your selves a break… a break from lying… a break from deceiving… and a break from just being somebody else’s puppet! Be the puppet master and let them submit to your qualms.

In friendship for instance, when you don’t want your friend to get hurt, instead of telling your friend about how you dislike her boyfriend because you can see how he wrongfully treats him or her, you’ll say, “I like your better-half he/she is cool.” Yeah right! Like cool is an emotion, it’s like saying you are fine. What is fine? Is that an emotion? I can say being happy or sad, those are emotions! Or when your friend is getting stupid, bitchy and bad you’ll take that friends side for the sake of friendship even if you know that she’s been doing wrong. Say it! Say it! “Hey friend, shut your mouth and listen to me. I don’t like how you treat people. Be kind and treat them like human!” or say “girl friend, I think you have to rethink about being serious with your boy because I think he is faking it.” I bet all the bitter things that you have uttered to your friend will do her good.  And you might have a long lasting genuine friendship.

In love, for example, when a guy/girl comes to you and tell you upfront that he/she likes you, you then reciprocate the same response towards the person even if you meant the opposite. Why not hurt that person in a nice way and let him/her feel a temporal pain than let him/her deem into a love that doesn’t exists? At least you did him/her a favor. In time he/she will get over you and will move on with his/her lives. Or do the opposite, if you like the person, why let the person suffer by making him/her guess about how you truly feel, say it to him/her, make your lives easy, the way GOD made it for us. Life is too short to be making it a WHOLE LIE!

If we are just true to ourselves, then this world will be a better place to live in. Let us start now! Let’s start by saying how we truly feel: (1)“I don’t like you to be more than my friend, but we can be friends, if you want.” (2) “mi amiga, slow down with the attitude, it might eat you alive” (3)you’re beautiful but I think you’re too good for him etc… etc…

If people won’t like you because of your honesty, well it’s their problem. At least you have taken loads of lies away from your system. And as you travel along life, you will be traveling light, because you have taken all the excess baggage of being untrue.

loving…

I’ve seen through the eyes of my friends, heard about different love stories that they have been, I didn’t know how love can be that ironic. How love can cause so much pain? This is not my own drama, what I’m telling you are the accounts of the lives of those dearest to me.

Several times, while I was slowly strolling through the dwellings of life, I often get SMS or calls from my friends who are in great desperation to meet up with at least one soul that he or she can pour his or her heart out to. And along came a free soul, which was in the form of ME. As I pursue our meetings we’ve had hearty and mushy moments. Talks on how their hearts got broken. How at a certain moment they thought everything was a bed of roses and suddenly became a bush of horrifying achy thorns.

As I empathize with their melancholia, I realized, what’s the use of loving, when at the end of the day you’ll have it all bruised up and eventually you’ll come out heartless? What’s the use of loving, when you’ll end up being cheated to? What’s the use of loving, when all else fail and no love can be generated? But even if these uncertainties are existent, still some people pursue to love. They allow their fragile hearts to be subjected into different forms of pain. In fact, its vastness is not limited into one type. Their sorrows can come into different forms they can be hurt PHYSICALLY, which can be easily shown through the naked eye but what’s good about it is that it heals easily, so long as your life is spared. Another type of inflicting agony is through EMOTIONS, how one lover can submit their supposed loved one into so much emotional-inequity or emotional-instability or whatever one calls it, as for me it’s never the emotion that one expects when loving. And this type of torture is distressing, so distressing that one can become insane and helpless. Lastly, one could fall into an obsession but the type of dire obsession that is misled, not because of loving but because of ghastly ill-intent, an intent that spurs out of revenge.

All in all, maybe I can conclude that they have found the “wrong love,” it’s erroneous because it had never served the purpose of love and it defied all the wonderful definition about love. What I always tell them is that, no love can be perfect, especially when one hasn’t found the person that’s right for him or her. And perfect love doesn’t exist, especially when you won’t allow GOD to delve into your relationship. When will one know if the person that he or she has bumped into is his or her mister or miss right? They say, you’ll know it when it comes, no words will be required. In time you’ll have a dose of the “RIGHT LOVE.” In time love will fall into the right place at the right time with the right person.

Everything’s passing…

What you have right now, you will loose later. Even your life, you will loose soon. I am not talking about bitter endings. Not even talking about how life will be taken away to a conclusion. All I want to confer is that despite this temporal life that we’re given, we’re still lucky to have been given the chance to live and experience all those glitz and not so glamorous moments.

Where could one experience to cry? Is there crying in heaven or hell or limbo maybe? Maybe there is crying in heaven, but those tears maybe brought by joys, mostly not because of self-centered emotions. I bet there is crying in hell, especially to those who are being relentlessly ignited because of their sins. And in limbo, I bet there is too, especially to those who really desire to rest on the dwellings of our loving FATHER. But crying on earth is different. You are given the chance to express it in many ways, through tears, being gloomy, angry etc… You are not spared from the drama of what tears can bring. Also, tears are not only a sole expression of resentment, but of happiness too. In general, emotions expressed here on earth doesn’t only signify one feeling, it encompass all ethereal retort, leaving one unable to express one’s emotions through words.

All I’m saying is that, life is too short to dwell on unhappy thoughts. Let’s live our lives to the fullest. Take away all the burdens that we have in our hearts and in our minds. Let’s love and be loved, forgive and be forgiven. Let us all be happy. Leave to “problem” all the problems it brings. Let us face each day with optimism that despite all crisis, disaster, failure and unpleasant events, there is still LIGHT.

Everything is passing in our lives, but if we make the most out of all these temporary things that is coming in to our lives then we would end our short lives without regrets.

Fairly odd occurrence…

It’s been a while since I’ve wrote on my blog spot, but anyway, I am now.

Have you ever had an odd incident coming in to your life? I did!

One time, while on duty, one guy came with some chocolates tied by a red ribbon with a greeting card on it. At first, I was hesitant because maybe it was not for me because there might be someone else with the same name but, heck t’was for me, according to my presupposed “HERMES” (MESSENGER for THE GODS, GREEK MYTHOLOGY), that is. I asked him about the person who gave those items to me, but his lips are sealed and hasn’t given me any name at all.

I did accept the chocolates but I gave it out to my colleagues who happened to be on duty on that same day. They were so excited to devour the tidy but lo and behold a worm came out of one of those chocolates that were given. We all grew surprised and found the event crazy. To me, it awakened my paranoia. I’ve just recently encountered a fight with a watcher and right there and then, that clash rekindled in my mind and drawn me in to thinking that it might be my karma or someone has sent it as a revenge. Yeah! That’s how paranoid I was. Till a physician saw those unopened chocolates at the refrigerator, she asked me about it and I generously gave it all to her but I warned her about the unpleasant creepy creatures that resides beneath those enticing wrappings. Despite my caution, she still pursued on meticulously checking out the insides of the chocolates and she found out that unlike the previous one that we’ve opened there was none of those eerie little objects in it. So I gave it all out to her. And she ate it all, it just so happen that dark chocolate is her favorite. As of this moment, she’s still up and about and there hasn’t been any mishap or some form of paranormal event that has happened to her. So maybe those worms just came in without notice.

Well what’s certain is that, the sender of those items remains anonymous and the reason how those creatures came in to those chocolates is still unanswered, but thanks anyway. Thank you to that someone who gave those sweets. It could’ve been sweeter, minus those little sinister and the paranoia (of course).

TWILIGHT…

I have heard of this from word of mouth, spreading unstoppably.

My first encounter of this craze is when I had my occasional visit at a certain bookstore to buy some ball pens. The book was placed on the middle of the store positioned in a way that every passerby could notice. And as successful as it was located, it has caught my eyes, but during that time, it was just a mere book with an attractive cover, to me.  But as words spread relentlessly, my curiosity about “TWILIGHT” grew.

Through “GOOGLING” it, I found out that, not only was it a series of love-story book, but also, a movie is shown about it. All in all, I’ve watched the film and fell in love with it. How one fearful but loving vampire can become so adorable, lovable and dreamy?!

How I wish EDWARD CULLEN do really exist?! (sigh) I really admire how he uses his strength to protect his one and ONLY love. If only humans have the same dedication, faithfulness, and love as he has towards BELLA, then maybe loving will be very likeable.

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Affiliation reparation, no action?

Most of the regular employees in my institution have the benefit of receiving an additional monetary compensation coming from the affiliation fee that is being paid by the hospital’s affiliates.  As what I have heard, they commonly collect an amount ranging from P3,000 or more, but this saccharine privilege is just bound to those who are regular including those that are not in the medical/healthcare service (e.g. admin).

they kept on DEMANDING… we are COLLAPSING

I’m done with VACATION and I’m back to reality. And our census ballooned into a whooping 63, in fact 66 if we will include the lobby (hear that). It’s the same scenario, patients from different walks of life with different healthcare needs. But what’s recent is that there are more middle-class individuals who are admitted in our poor-incomplete-lowtech-charity ward. Maybe, this occurrence has been brought about by the inflation of so many commodities that most people can’t even afford to fancy a swanky-upscale hospital.

Recently, there were so many demands like, prioritizing their patient because they are also working at the government and we should empathize. We do prioritize our patients, but in this circumstance, we are catering to 63 patients, considering that 16 of those are “ICU-able” and are hooked to mechanical ventilators and should be monitored frequently, so they come 1^st in terms of prioritization. Did I mention there are only two as in: “DOS-DUHA-ER-DEUX-2,” nurses who are catering for these patients.

Demands in my ward comes in like speeding hurricane, awaiting to tear us apart. Ma’am the IV of my patient is about to be consumed pls attend to it, ma’am my patient accidentally removed his IV pls hurry, ma’am my patient pulled out his NGT HURRY, ma’am my mom is having difficulty of breathing, ma’am my mom can’t sleep pls do something, ma’am I don’t have an appetite to eat what can I do, ma’am the patient is on cardiac arrest, ma’am another patient is not having any pulse, ma’am where’s that chart of patient so and so, ma’am do you have any prescription, where’s the gloves, your laryngoscope is not working find me another one, pls change the wire guide, why aren’t there IV tags… and so on and so forth and the demands never STOP and they all come in at the same time… SANITY, SANITY, pls stay with ME.

Of all these demands, it’s lucky for us if they will ask us kindly and they will say please. Most often, some other people think that we are their slaves that we should swiftly attend to their qualms. Of course, knowing the ratio and proportion constraint that we are facing we can’t attend to them as quickly as they want especially when we are still catering to patients who have problems with ABC (airway, breathing, circulation) after all, that’s where we root our prioritization. Then tension rises, and as a professional you should keep your cool and should bear in mind that you’re there to CARE… “INNER PEACE… INNER PEACE.” But then this assertive watcher returns, shouting his nerves out, looking possessed and hell-bound, telling us all forms of threats:  that they’ve been paying taxes and should be served right, that they are politicians, nurses, working in the government, they are friends with the chief of hospital, they will expose us to the media etc… etc… “INNER PEACE!” “INNER PEACE!” “SANITY!” “HEAR ME SANITY!”

Apart from those threats, they even call us “TANGA” and the like. Pardon, baka ikaw?! If we were indeed clumsy, we should’ve been in jail suffering from malpractice of some sort because of lumbering incapacity, but we aren’t. In fact, we even came from pricey prestigious schools to get educated to be able to qualify to attend to them. We even managed to pass exams from the local ones up to the lavish international ones. In addition, we have qualified to work abroad and are just awaiting our documents (OH DEAR GOD PLS MAKE IT QUICK!). So where’s the “TANGA” part there, if we were “TANGA” we couldn’t have gotten as far as we did. FIGURE THAT?! KAPISH?!

These things often times makes me frustrated about working. Why can’t they understand? If they want to have high-end service, where in, in just one click they will be attended to, one in which the ratio of one nurse to a patient is 1:1, then they are guaranteed that their expectations will be served even beyond their imaginations. But the thing is, they don’t have the money to be admitted to those luxurious hospitals so they settle for us. Why don’t they put the blame to the government, why? Because everything originated there. If they will give an ample amount of budget for healthcare, then government hospitals will be adequately managed with healthcare providers and the ratio is well proportioned. But then our government is so busy dealing with other things that HEALTHCARE has been disregarded.

As this situation is slowly engulfing and gnawing us, we are inch-by-inch weakened physically and emotionally. It’s either one grows a calloused heart or one resigns because he can’t handle the PRESSURE. Another deduction to the work force. I just hope someday this PROBLEM will be resolved.

Lastly, of all these precarious innuendo, we are not compensated well; we don’t have hazard pay, overtime pay and all those insurance stuffs that will ensure us of our own HEALTH. So our unconscious motto is, “CARE AT YOUR OWN RISK.” You can’t really blame a nurse who is toiling hard to have the sweetest desire of WORKING ABROAD, where in we are COMPENSATED WELL, TAX-FREE, with ALL THOSE PRIVILEGES and STUFFS. And free from those draining RUBBISH.

immigration = corruption

Immigration = corruption

Corruption is an undeniable occurrence in the Philippines. In fact, it runs from the highest position up to the lowest end you could ever imagine. Corruption in our country knows no bound, it won’t let pass anyone, even his own fellowmen.

I myself had experienced the bitter reality of this ill-quality that most of our fellowmen have.

I just came from a vacation abroad. Beforehand, I was so excited and anxious about the trip because it was my first international vacation. I have anticipated problems such as luggage excess and weather problems. I have prayed for a safe trip. But lo and behold a dilemma came and it was nothing that I have ever thought of. We were on our way to the immigration, for our passports to be stamped a certain pass for us to be able to go abroad, we were all smiles, and we even greeted the immigration officer. Only to find out that we have to procure another copy of an endorsement letter coming from my mom stating the address that we are staying at. At first, it was fine, because we still have an ample time to do that, I just have to call my mom to fax a letter to the airline (through the airline’s number)  stationed at the airport and address the letter to the immigration officer. Oh, bide away, our flight is at 3:30pm and our boarding time is at 3pm, it was just 2pm then, so we just kept our cool. It took 45minutes for the fax to arrive because the airline’s number was busy, but at last it arrived. So we proceeded to the immigration to get a pass, but we found out that the immigration officer who asked for that requirement was not there anymore so another immigration officer interrogated us, this time he was not contented of the documents that we have shown him, he now asked us to give him a letter from the Philippines’ Consul stating that my mom is indeed working at that place and that we should attach our pictures on that letter (what the heck?!). On such little time? It was 3pm that time and it was our boarding time. What he had asked for was a miracle! We lost our hope of having to arrive on our vacation destination on our target date. Out of desperation, we headed to the airline’s counter and inquired about the payment for rescheduling a flight. The airline officer advised us to try our luck again, to try on a different immigration officer, mind you it was 3:15pm. So we headed to the immigration’s queue again, this time a police officer approached us stating, “anong problema?” We told him our problem and he said, “ah wala akong magagawa dyan pero kung magbabayad kayo magagawan ko yan ng paraan.” I told him, “how much?” He told us,”P3,000.” I asked: “both?” He said: “each.” At first I told him that we didn’t have that much money. But then as we go farther from him I realized that we didn’t have any other way and that if we will reschedule our flight we will still meet the same set of immigration officers and God knows what other requirements they can come up with. We just want to have a VACATION, for CHRIST sake GIVE US A BREAK, it’s MY BIRTHDAY!!! So we settled with that corrupted deal, I cannot imagine that it was happening to me in my own country, in front of the people of the GOVERNMENT and in the hands of the PEOPLE THAT WE LOOK UP TO! He gave us a paper and he asked us to write down our names and to slip in the money. So we did as he said, I was shivering then, my shivers was brought about by anxiety, frustration, anger and disbelief. I WAS CORRUPTED BY MY OWN FELLOWMEN in MY OWN COUNTRY, INFRONT OF OTHER PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT NATIONALITIES ON MY BIRTHDAY!!! What a gift?! So we hurried up to the immigration queue, as we were falling in line with the specific row that we were told about, the policeman was busy communicating with the immigration officer through SMS. During that time, a staff from the airline approached us because they were searching for us because we were the last passengers who weren’t able to get on board, YET. So we cut the line and went ahead of the other passengers (it was a good thing, they were considerate, at least some good souls). This time, this certain immigration officer did not interrogate us or did not even attempt to take a glimpse of our tickets, instead he just took a short glimpse of what seemed to me as if he was reading an SMS and then he stamped our passports and out we go to our aircraft. WHEeeEEWww!

On board the aircraft, I can’t still hide my emotions about what just happened. I was still in shock with disbelief. I even cried. This is one of the worst things ever! Curse them! I even grew paranoid that this may happen to us upon arrival on the country that we are destined to go but my paranoia failed, everything went smoothly at the immigration of that country, they greeted us with smiles and without any questions they gave us our 1MONTH VACATION PASS! WHHHhhhhaAAt? I was treated kindly by persons who are not my “KABABAYAN” and I was treated ACCORDINGLY in ANOTHER COUNTRY! AND I SHOULD BE PROUD TO BE A FILIPINO????!!!!

As much as I want to relive everything that our FILIPINO HEROES has done, for me to shake-off my hatred towards those frustrating officers, but I just can’t, my colonial mentality is slowly being buoyed up by that horrendous event. The worst thing is that, at that moment, I hated being a FILIPINO, how corrupt, selfish, dishonest, crooked, shady, distorted and shameful we are. I wish I could’ve come from another nationality, one which conserves HONESTY and RESPECT towards their fellowmen. But as I internalized things, it’s not PHILIPPINES’ fault to have been cursed by so many CORRUPTED individuals. Our country has been so unlucky to have delivered such individuals. Then I realized, I should not blame it to my mother land, but I should blame it to those who horrifyingly harm her with their evilness.

Lastly, as we went home from our vacation we have to pass by those same ILL immigration officers. Another commotion happened it was between a BALIKBAYAN and a certain IMMIGRATION OFFICER.  Everybody had their eyes on both of them because their argument was slowly filling the room.

 Immigration Officer: “sir! Wla po kayong address dito?”

BALIKBAYAN:”meron”

Immigration officer: “EH! BAKIT HINDI NAKSULAT? (referring to the disembarkation form)”

BALIKBAYAN: “meron po ma’am, ayan po”

Immigration officer: “ANONG ZIPCODE? BAKIT WALANG ZIPCODE DOON SA LUGAR NINYO? WALANG STREET?”

Then she immediately disregarded that person, putting him on hold and leaving him hanging. All that poor man wants to do was just to get back to his OWN COUNTRY and he was faced with that CRAP! Those immigration officers think that they are some sort of GODS that everyone has to bow down to them. We’ll I believe in KARMA. What goes around comes around. Love begets love and evil begets evil. God even reminds us that , ”what you have done to the least of my brothers, you have done unto me.” So GOOD LUCK to them. Even if I would want to get even with them because of what they have done, I know someone who is more powerful than us and who is carefully watching our every move will show them the same courteousness as they have shown others. KAYA SA KANILA… GOD BLESS!

double decker supreme

Sounds like an ice cream flavor right? It’s no ice cream flavor. It can’t get even close to ice cream seeing that it doesn’t bring any sweet delight. Why? It’s what I dub on our new hospital situation right now. Patients are coming in “schools/platoons/herds/groups!” They arrive indefinitely. It goes beyond counting, that we extended our beds at the alley. Maybe, soon, they will have to build a custom made bed, wherein patients are laid on a triple deck or quadruple deck and they are positioned by row and by column. So that irregardless of the tiny space, we will be able to accommodate them in a vertical perspective. So by that time when we look for patients, there will be a certain Mr. X on row4 column11. Greater number of patients, but the same number of healthcare providers. How is that? Talk about quality healthcare???

dreams

 According to Wikepedia, dreams are the images, thoughts and feelings experienced while asleep, particularly strongly associated with rapid eye movement sleep. The contents and biological purposes of dreams are not fully understood, though they have been a topic of speculation and interest throughout recorded history. The scientific study of dreams is known as oneirology.

On the other hand, most often I have dreams, but mostly the meanings of those dreams are unclear. Sometimes, I share my dreams with my friends, just to solicit their thoughts. Then I turned to a   dream dictionary for me to fully understand what those “REM-scenes” are giving meaning to. Mostly, I have dreams where in I fall, it’s either I fell from a building or a bridge. I also dream about past events that I have but in manner of my own interpretation. There are also times where in my dream is gibberish. Often, I end up not remembering my dream all I can remember though is that I dreamt.

I also found an online dreams dictionary. It features everything about dreams like: dictionary, theories, interpretations, symbolism and it also has a bible dream dictionary. The dream dictionary delves into the power of your dreams. This dictionary unlocks the  enigmatic and cryptic realms into your conscious and unconscious minds. In this Dream Dictionary, you find general as well as detailed interpretations of hundreds of dream symbols helping you to interpret even your most mind boggling dreams. While, the dream theories and interpretation dictionary encompasses various facets of the dream and sleep phenomena: from the traditional and the conventional to the vanguard and the eccentric. By browsing through this fascinating compilation of terms you will be introduced to this exciting field of dream research. Explore the varied angles of approaches used in Psychology, Physiology, Oneirology, among others. Alsom the enchanting and motivational dictionary of dream quotations surmounts to an outstanding collection of the forefront and influential thinkers of all times and their relationship with dreams. Browse through it and be sure to find thoughts, inspiration, self-empowerment or sheer amusement in the words of those whose dreams were a constant reminder of our truly nature as humans. Within the wide spectrum covered in the quotations is the understanding of dreams as metaphors for future, hope, plan, achievement, self fulfillment, life, utopia, success, challenge, and possibilities. The dictionary of dream symbols is useful for identifying the subject matter of your dreams. The dictionary explains the meaning of the location of your dream, as the location indicates not only the subject matter of the dream, but also the cause and the dreamer’s state of mind. The descriptions for many symbols include links to further references. Lastly, the Bible Dream Dictionary is one of a kind in which it contains all possible references to and quotations of dreams as they appear in the Bible. It gives a divinatory as well as an anthropological insight in the realm of dreams and their relevance in the lives and worldviews of the Bible characters in both the Old and the New Testaments. Let yourself be enchanted by finding out the divine power of dreams which held truth in ancient times as much as it does today.

coffee 101

 
Coffee is a widely-consumed stimulant beverage prepared from roasted seeds, commonly called coffee beans, of the coffee plant. Coffee was first consumed in the 9th century, when it was discovered in the highlands of Ethiopia. From there, it spread to Egypt and Yemen, and by the 15th century had reached Armenia, Persia, Turkey, and northern Africa. From the Muslim world, coffee spread to Italy, then to the rest of Europe and the Americas. Today, coffee is one of the most popular beverages worldwide.

Coffee berries, which contain the coffee bean, are produced by several species of small evergreen bush of the genus Coffea. The two most commonly grown species are Coffea canephora (also known as Coffea robusta) and Coffea arabica. These are cultivated in Latin America, Southeast Asia, and Africa. Once ripe, coffee berries are picked, processed, and dried. The seeds are then roasted, undergoing several physical and chemical changes. They are roasted to varying degrees, depending on the desired flavor. They are then ground and brewed to create coffee. Coffee can be prepared and presented by a variety of methods.

Coffee has played an important role in many societies throughout modern history. In Africa and Yemen, it was used in religious ceremonies. As a result, the Ethiopian Church banned its consumption until the reign of Emperor Menelik II of Ethiopia. It was banned in Ottoman Turkey in the 17th century for political reasons, and was associated with rebellious political activities in Europe.

Coffee is an important export commodity. In 2004, coffee was the top agricultural export for 12 countries, and in 2005, it was the world’s seventh largest legal agricultural export by value.

Some controversy is associated with coffee cultivation and its impact on the environment. Many studies have examined the relationship between coffee consumption and certain medical conditions; whether the effects of coffee are positive or negative is still disputed

The English word coffee first came to be used in the early- to mid-1600s, but early forms of the word date to the last decade of the 1500s. It comes from the Italian caffè. The term was introduced to Europe via the Ottoman Turkish kahveh which is in turn derived from the Arabic: قهوة‎, qahweh. The origin of the Arabic term is uncertain; it is either derived from the name of the Kaffa region in western Ethiopia, where coffee was cultivated, or by a truncation of qahwat al-būnn, meaning "wine of the bean" in Arabic. In Eritrea, "būnn" (also meaning "wine of the bean" in Tigrinya) is used. The Amharic and Afan Oromo name for coffee is bunna.

Coffee use can be traced at least to as early as the 9th century, when it appeared in the highlands of Ethiopia. According to legend, Ethiopian shepherds were the first to observe the influence of the caffeine in coffee beans when the goats appeared to "dance" and to have an increased level of energy after consuming wild coffee berries. The legend names the shepherd "Kaldi." From Ethiopia, coffee spread to Egypt and Yemen. It was in Arabia that coffee beans were first roasted and brewed similarly as they are today. By the 15th century, it had reached the rest of the Middle East, Persia, Turkey, and northern Africa.

In 1583, Leonhard Rauwolf, a German physician, gave this description of coffee after returning from a ten year trip to the Near East: “A beverage as black as ink, useful against numerous illnesses, particularly those of the stomach. Its consumers take it in the morning, quite frankly, in a porcelain cup that is passed around and from which each one drinks a cupful. It is composed of water and the fruit from a bush called bunnu.”

From the Muslim world, coffee spread to Italy. The thriving trade between Venice and North Africa, Egypt, and the Middle East brought many goods, including coffee, to the Venetian port. From Venice, it was introduced to the rest of Europe. Coffee became more widely accepted after it was deemed a Christian beverage by Pope Clement VIII in 1600, despite appeals to ban the "Muslim drink". The first European coffee house opened in Italy in 1645. The Dutch were the first to import coffee on a large scale, and they were among the first to defy the Arab prohibition on the exportation of plants or unroasted seeds when Pieter van den Broeck smuggled seedlings from Aden into Europe in 1616. The Dutch later grew the crop in Java and Ceylon. Through the efforts of the British East India Company, coffee became popular in England as well. It was introduced in France in 1657, and in Austria and Poland after the 1683 Battle of Vienna, when coffee was captured from supplies of the defeated Turks.

stolen item

 Someone has stolen the glucometer in our unit.

A glucose meter (or glucometer) is a medical device for determining the approximate concentration of glucose in the blood. It is a key element of home blood glucose monitoring (HBGM) by people with diabetes mellitus or with proneness to hypoglycemia. A small drop of blood obtained by pricking the skin with a lancet is placed on a disposable test strip, which the meter reads and uses to calculate the blood glucose level. The meter then displays the level in mg/dl or mmol/l.

On the other hand, till the time that the item got stolen, our unit remained reliant upon the availability of glucometer of other wards. And it is not helpful. Not only does it makes us parasites, it also delays our client care.

I just hope that who ever stole our glucometer will return it. 

noise

 I have never had someone who had given me a headache just by merely uttering words. In fact, I have never had a friend who is as loud as me that had made me loose my thoughts because of severe headache.

I had this colleague, who graduated at the same school that I have studied at, when I was in college. We were just "cliche friends" before, because he was a year younger than me. Until, we became colleagues and had work at the same unit. His loudness has come to my knowledge through word of mouth, it only came to a bitter realization that his loudness was indeed a cry of deadly-wrath when we had a back-to-back duty.

At first, everything was tolerable. I could even endure the volume and tone of his voice that was slowly gnawing my tympanic membrane, it was a loud shrill, yet tolerable. Up until I can’t merely decipher things that are getting into my auditory sense. All I can hear are mere mumbles but are annoying buzzes that almost made me puke. At that point I thought the ossicles in my inner ear could not quite coordinate because of the noise pollution that it’s facing.

"yada.. yada.. yada.." "balahura" "blah" blah" "buzzzzzzZzzz…." imagine that on a low tone but loud voice, plus imagine that being uttered by a number of people and I bet you’d go nuts. Even the strongest pain reliever can’t relieve you of the damage it has caused.

In relation to this, I’ve learned that noise is defined as complex sound waves that are aperiodic, in other words, sound waves with irregular vibrations and no definite pitch. Noise in our environment affects physical heath. Noise also has psychological and social implications and affects our well being and quality of life. In addition, noise not only affects hearing. It affects other parts of the body and body systems. It is now known that noise: (1)Increases blood pressure (2)Has negative cardiovascular effects such as changing the way the heart beats (3)Increases breathing rate (4) Disturbs digestion (5) Can cause an upset stomach or ulcer (6)Can negatively impact a developing fetus, perhaps contributing to premature birth (7) Makes sleeping difficult, even after the noise stops   and (8) Intensifies the effects of factors like drugs, alcohol, aging and carbon monoxide.

Both the amount of noise and the length of time you are exposed to the noise determine its ability to damage your hearing. Noise levels are measured in decibels (dB). The higher the decibel level, the louder the noise. Sounds louder than 80 decibels are considered potentially hazardous. The noise chart below gives an idea of average decibel levels for everyday sounds around you:

Painful

150 dB = rock music peak

             = ROGELIO RAFAEL DAJAO (te paeng.. love U)

140 dB = firearms, air raid siren, jet engine

130 dB = jackhammer

120 dB = jet plane take-off, amplified rock music at 4-6 ft., car stereo, band practice

Extremely Loud

110 dB = rock music, model airplane

106 dB = timpani and bass drum rolls

100 dB = snowmobile, chain saw, pneumatic drill

90 dB = lawnmower, shop tools, truck traffic, subway

Very Loud

80 dB = alarm clock, busy street

70 dB = busy traffic, vacuum cleaner

60 dB = conversation, dishwasher

Moderate

50 dB = moderate rainfall

40 dB = quiet room

Faint

30 dB = whisper, quiet library

On the other hand, if you think you have "gotten used to" the noise you are routinely exposed to, then most likely you have already suffered damage and have acquired a permanent hearing loss. Don’t be fooled by thinking your ears are "tough" or that you have the ability to "tune it out"! Noise induced hearing loss is usually gradual and painless, but, unfortunately, permanent. Once destroyed, the hearing nerve and its sensory nerve cells do not regenerate! 

Lastly, protect Yourself from "Noise." The key word in dealing with noise is prevention! We want to eliminate unwanted noise when we can. When noise cannot be eliminated, we want to keep it as low as possible. Here are some things to do:

• Wear hearing protectors when exposed to any loud or potentially damaging noise at work, in the community (heavy traffic, rock concerts, hunting, etc.) or at home (mowing the lawn, snow blowing the driveway, etc.). Cotton in your ears won’t work. Hearing protectors include ear muffs and ear plugs (not swimmer’s plugs), some that are custom-made and individually molded. This protection can be purchased at drug stores, sporting goods stores or can be custom-made. Check with your audiologist to find out what best suits you.
• Limit periods of exposure to noise. Don’t sit next to the speakers at concerts, discos, or auditoriums. If you are at a rock concert, walk out for awhile give your ears a break ! If you are a musician, wear ear protection–it is a necessity! Take personal responsibility for your hearing.
• Pump down the volume! When using stereo headsets or listening to amplified music in a confined place like a car, turn down the volume. Remember: if a friend can hear the music from your headset when standing three feet away, the volume is definitely too high. Don’t be afraid to ask others to turn down the volume.
• Educate yourself about the damaging effects of noise and what you can do to prevent your exposure to noise.
• Educate others and take action! Educate your children through discussion and by example. Wear your ear protection and encourage your children to follow your example. Provide them with ear protection. Remind them to turn down stereo headsets. A rule of thumb is that, if sound from a head set can be heard by others 3 feet away, it is too loud.
• Be a responsible consumer. Look for a noise rating when buying recreational equipment, children’s toys, household appliances, and power tools. Choose quieter models, especially for equipment that you use often or close to your ears like a hair dryer. If there is no noise rating, contact the manufacturer and ask for one!
• Inspect your child’s toys for noise danger just as you do for small parts that can cause choking. Remember, too, that children tend to hold toys close to their ear which can pose additional threat for hearing damage.
• Have your hearing tested by an audiologist certified by the American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (ASHA), especially if you are concerned about possible hearing loss. Remember the warning signs of over exposure to noise.
• Be aware of the noise in your environment and take control of it when you can. Be an advocate for reducing noise pollution. Your county may have a local noise ordinance. Find out what you can do in your community to advocate for quiet. For example, some schools have set a decibel limit for the music played at school dances in order to protect the students’ hearing.
• Be an advocate! Remember there are no regulations governing how loud sound can be in public places such as discos, movie theaters, dance clubs, exercise centers. Work with owners, managers, and community leaders to create a healthier less noxious listening environment.

BLS

 Basic Life Support (BLS) is a specific level of prehospital medical care provided by trained responders, including emergency medical technicians, in the absence of advanced medical care.

Basic Life Support consists of a number of life-saving techniques focused on the "ABC"s of pre-hospital emergency care: (1)Airway: the protection and maintenance of patient airway including the use of airway adjuncts such as an oral or nasal airway (2)Breathing: the actual flow of air through respiration, natural or artificial respiration, often assisted by emergency oxygen (3)Circulation: the movement of blood through the beating of the heart or the emergency measure of CPR

BLS may also include considerations of patient transport such as the protection of the cervical spine and avoiding additional injuries through splinting and immobilization.

BLS generally does not include the use of drugs or invasive skills, and can be contrasted with the provision of Advanced cardiac life support (ACLS). Most laypersons can master BLS skill after attending a short course. Firefighters and police officers are often required to be BLS certified. BLS is also immensely useful for many other professions, such as daycare providers, teachers and security personnel.

CPR provided in the field buys time for higher medical responders to arrive and provide ACLS. For this reason it is essential that any person starting CPR also obtains ACLS support by calling for help via radio using agency policies and procedures and/or using an appropriate emergency telephone number.

An important advance in providing BLS is the availability of the automated external defibrillator or AED, which can be used to deliver defibrillation. This improves survival outcomes in cardiac arrest cases, sometimes dramatically.

New BLS guidelines was published by the American Heart Association in December 2005.

The term BLS is also used in some non-English speaking countries (e.g. in Italy) for the education of first responders. (1) Belgium: Aide médicale urgente ("emergency medical assistance")/ EHBO (Eerste Hulp Bij Ongelukken, "first aid") (2) France: PSE 2 (Premiers Secours en Equipe 2e niveau, Team rescue worker 2n level) = former CFAPSE (before 2007)(certificat de formation aux activités des premiers secours en équipe, "education certificate for the team first responder activity") (3)Poland: Podstawowe zabiegi resuscytacyjne (4) Germany: Erste Hilfe Schein (first aid certificate) (5)Romania: SVB (Suport Vital de Bază) (6) Netherlands: EHBO (Eerste Hulp Bij Ongelukken, "first aid"). However, these courses do not include the use of drugs or of invasive techniques, but include the management of various traumas and casualty lifting and movement.

On the other hand, BLS is one the essential knowledge that healthcare providers should have. In fact, BLS is included in our nursing curriculum. However, there are also updates and seminars that are given for us to enrich our learning.